As most of you know, round two of getting pregnant hasn't been the easiest thing for us....to say the least! This journey for us started 20 months ago! I was on a girl's trip in Dallas for my 28th birthday (I'm about to be 30 now) and I thought, "Wow, this is my last hoorah before we get pregnant with baby number two". Boy....was I wrong!
I'm not going to say that the last 20 months were easy and not completely disappointing at times but a part of me is kinda glad that Jeremy and I went through this learning process together. When I say "learning process", I am referring to the many things that God taught us along the way that, otherwise, we wouldn't have learned or appreciated! Some would say that I am OCD, a planner, over-the-top in many areas but this past year, I learned that all the plans that I may have for my life don't mean anything!! I have kinda learned that I need to sit back and enjoy the ride! It really is all about Him! His plans are all that matter!
I would also like to point out the fact that I personally couldn't have made it through the past 20 months if I didn't have Jeremy by my side. Not once did he give me a hard time about anything I was putting him through. Not once did he fail to lift me up and encourage me when I felt like things were hopeless. I truly think that God had a plan when He picked out Jeremy for my life. I will forever be grateful for the ongoing love and support that he continuously offered me on this journey.
Fast forward to two months ago, my wonderful ex-aunt kinda took me under her wing and offered to take a look at our situation and figure out exactly what is going on. She recommended we go to a WONDERFUL fertility doctor (Robert Kauffman) in Fort Worth. From the get go, him and Jeremy hit it off! He was associating fertility with the Yankees and baseball and Jeremy was immediately on board with anything he had to offer! The first month was disappointing. Obviously didn't work but that's ok!
On to month number two of our fertility treatment journey. We decided to try one more time. Week after week, traveling to Fort Worth was starting to wear on me! My 8:00 appointments were wearing me out! Dr. Kauffman had decided to up my fertility drugs a little. Not only would I be taking the pills, I would also be taking the daily shots. I went in for my sonogram before the actual procedure to make sure that my body responded well to the drugs. I went by myself so that Jeremy could take care of Savannah. During the sonogram, the doctor became really quiet. After she was done, I asked her is everything was ok. Normally, she says everything looks good and fills me in on our next step. This time, she looks at me and says, " I will be right back". I immediately went in to panic mode. I was by myself and she was about to tell me that I have cancer. I just knew it! Then, she walks back in with Dr. Kauffman. He immediately says, "Crystal, your body responded well to the drugs...TOO WELL." He went on to say that it would be WAY too dangerous to proceed with this process. I was crushed! I had put WAY too many miles, money and time away from work into this to give up! He said that because my body responded so well to the drugs, I now had 7 eggs inside of me and I would have no less than 5 kids if we continued on. He went on to tell me that we have two options. 1) I go home and we start again next month. 2) I aspirate half of the eggs in one of the ovaries.
Long story short, I chose option number two (all by myself) and I definitely made the right decision. The next day, Jeremy and I went back for the actual procedure. I was pretty excited about our odds until the actual procedure day. Because of different circumstances, we weren't given very good odds. At that point, I put the whole idea out of my mind. Two weeks later, I was supposed to go get my blood test to see I was actually pregnant. I was kinda put out at the fact that I had to do that because we were in the middle of a serious garage sale (where I moved some pretty heavy pieces of furniture) and the lab that I went to lost my orders, so nothing was going right. I am being serious when I say that I truly did NOT think about the blood test one time that day....
Around 3:00, we were wrapping things up with the sale and my phone rang. The dreaded "Robert Kauffman" came up on my phone. I had already received a "we're sorry, you are not pregnant" phone call and that was NO fun, so I was dreading this phone call considering I didn't think the procedure worked. As I am walking down the sidewalk away from everyone at the garage sale so they don't have to hear my rejection call and feel sorry for the poor lost soul that just can NOT get pregnant, I quickly say, "hello." A very nice nurse answers the phone and says "Crystal, this is so and so from Dr. Kauffman's office and I am calling with your test results." I am thinking in my head, "Just get it over with". She then says something that still to this day BLOWS MY MIND! "You are pregnant! Congratulations!" I, being the mature adult that I am said, "SHUT UP!" and she laughs and says, "Yes!" From this point on, I stayed on the phone with her a couple of minutes while she laid out the plan for what would happen the following weeks and I honestly have NO idea what she said! My mind zoned out and I started shaking and, at this point, I am so far away from the garage sale!
I quickly pull my sunglasses down because I was BAWLING and I bust into the house. Jodi immediately thinks that something awful happened outside! I pull myself together and the rest is history!!! All I remember after that is finally being able to make that wonderful phone call to Jeremy and let him know that he is going to be a Daddy of two!
The picture at the top of the page is the happy big sister! I actually bought that shirt 20 months ago when we started trying so it has been patiently waiting to be worn for a while now! We put the shirt on her so that we could go around and tell our family! Savannah had no idea why everyone was so excited because we waited to tell her until we had our first sonogram so we could show her a picture. She kept thinking that everyone was flipping out over the shirt because her name was on it.
I know that I would be over-the-top excited if we would have gotten pregnant 20 months ago, but I'm not sure if I would be aware of just how blessed we are. I mean, sure, I would say this new baby is such a blessing but would I really get it? Would I get the fact that our first child was a complete miracle and test results show that we shouldn't have even gotten pregnant the first go round? Would I really feel the full blessing of my children. Would I fully realize the power of prayer? Would I really believe in my heart that He is the planner and not me? Would I really believe in His wonderful plan for my life and accept the fact that 20 months from the time I thought I should get pregnant was actually the time that He planned for me to get pregnant? Would I appreciate how much He cares about me and wants me to have the desires of my heart just on His timing? Who knows?
So, long story short, we are so thankful and blessed by what God has given us. I am beyond blessed that there is a baby growing inside of me again. I am beyond blessed to have a 3 year old to share the joy with this time.
I am beyond blessed...
